Lately I have been contention with imperfection in my life.
As a part of the mosaic of humanity it is understanded that I will fail, but facing failure is hard to look straight in its’ one eye. It’s a rather ugly eye. It has a menacing perfectly arched unibrow overtop. I’m not sure which I am more fearful of – seeing the hairy catepillar of a brow or the eye itself.
Anyways point is, there I stood overtop of our toilet watching the mess in the toilet swirl around and around. Not only had I killed our herb garden due to lack of maintenance but I had decided it was time to do something about it and had given it a sever growth cutback. I thought, now where should I put the dried out basil leaves. I went straight to our toilet.
The logic should hopefully be more than self-explanatory. I would flush and the problem would be no more and shriveled up basil is small. Well I didn’t calculate the branches getting stuck. They were withered and completely small enough to go down that pipe but apparently not to cooperate. So there it swirled. This mass of droopy green and brown mess. Tangled much like the logic that had brought me to this predicament in the first place. Suddenly a flashback to a particular dinner party came to mind. I have a habit of thinking that the toilet can be used like a garborator.
I had been in a rush to clean some stuff out of the fridge before guests came. I had seen a bunch of containers that needed to be cleaned out. I rinsed them out, barely glancing to see what was inside them and rushed to the toilet to dispose of the nasty water. Went on my way cleaning the house and thought nothing of it. The guests arrived for a lovely dinner and just as we were cleaning up, someone emerged from our bathroom with a perplexed look on their face.
They directed me to find molding tortellini floating in the toilet bowl. The whole party gathered around to see what the kaffufel was all about. Embarassing moments are bad enough without an audience. Our rubber gloves had ripped recently and so not only did I have to wear a plastic bag over my hand to fish them out, it was captured on someone’s camera.
The roar of laughter was enough to even put me in a good mood. Even if it was happening to me, it was hilarious. We tried to flush after the tortellini was safely in the garbage.
Unfortunately it backed up again. I dove my bagged hand in again. This time to my horror I fished out a full piece of lotus root. The laughing subsided to questions of “what the heck is that?” and “how did that end up in there?” How I hadn’t noticed the lotus root go into the toilet bowl is beyond me. Even to this day I have to laugh at the absurdity of the situation.
Above and beyond that, I know eventually I’ll learn from my mistakes. The green swirly I think was enough of a reminder to hammer the last nail in that coffin of my memory on that.
1 comment:
My mom has always done that too (the disposing of foods in the toilet, not the clogging it and having to reach in part!) It has always made me feel like vomiting and so I try to refrain. However I do like that you've now moved on to flushing small trees and shrubs. Yeah, that's not going to be a problem at all... ;)
Post a Comment